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The New Family :: Vol 1

26 Nov
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Isn’t it funny how sometimes there are dates or certain times of year that tend to hold coincidental significance?  Like the 25th – for me it’s my birthday, it was the birthday of two of the girls I babysat for, and the anniversary date of their parents!  Or the 1st, it’s both of my girls birthdays.  Or the 19th, which is my dad and two of my siblings birthdays.

Or Easter time….Not only is it the day Jesus rose from the grave, but in our house, it also commemorates the weekend we got engaged and it’s around the same time we got the New Family.

Since November is National Adoption Month, I figured this would be a great time to share my husbands story.

I was just thinking about this the other day as we planned a day home to Fort Wayne with three stops.  My parents, Mike’s parents, and the new family.  Yes, I say ‘new’ because that’s how I refer to the NEW 16 family members we have welcomed into our lives and who have so graciously welcomed us into theirs.

ADOPTED

We’ve always known my husband was adopted.  He’s known since forever.  I’ve known  since I met him.  It’s always been front of mind.
I’ve also known that he has always wanted to try to find his birth parents.  Mostly to know if he had any siblings.
And I’ve always been on board with him taking on this search.

He was adopted in the 1970s through Catholic Social Services.  He was born prematurely.  He had clubbed feet.  And he found a forever home with Mike & Darla.  Darla couldn’t have children so they looked to adopt.  I think they would have adopted more if they could, but they took Kevin (his name at the time) in, gave him a new name – Michael Oliver, and in true Mike & Darla fashion, spoiled him rotten and treated him like he was their blood.

They were the parents I was introduced to.
They are our children’s grandparents.
They will always be Nonna and Grandpa to my girls.
They are Mike’s parents and nothing will change that…
And I know that all these things were taken into consideration when considering seeking out information on his biological parents because he didn’t want to offend or upset or ruffle any feathers of those who have given him so much…

ANCESTRY DNA

But I knew something was calling Mike to take on this search…
It did seem like a daunting task that could take forever and possibly never result in anything or even end up not so happy…

So while I was 100% on board, I was also 100% leery of what might be ahead.

But with that being said, when he turned 40, I got him a surprise that he’d been asking for for a very long time.  Along with a very fun compilation of videos from his friends and family across the united states that I organized via Tribute, I surprised him with an Ancestry.com DNA kit.  As soon as he opened it, I swear it was back in the mailbox to be sent out for processing.  It only took four weeks to receive the results and once they come back, you can sign into Ancestry to see your connections.  For Mike, this included around 300 matches which included first and second cousins.

He had matches for two family names in particular (which I won’t share just for privacy purposes).  He kept looking at names and where people were born and/or died.  He’d stay up super late night after night.  After just a few weeks of long nights of searching and building family trees, he noticed that someone was born in West Virginia but had died in Indiana (specifically the town he was adopted from) and that, he says, was finding the needle in the haystack because it was too coincidental.

SEARCHING FOR TIES

One of the first people he reached out to was a lady managing a family tree for someone else.  This was a tree for one of the two names he was related to.  He sent something like “Hi, This may be a long shot, but I saw we had quite a few identifiers on ancestry.  I looked a little deeper into your family tree and saw that the {Insert Family Name} were from small-town Indiana.  I was born there and adopted in Fort Wayne.  It would be interesting if we were related…”

He kept looking and noticed the other family name.  He also noticed that this was another case where someone died in the small Indiana town.  For that person, he found an obituary that had listed two grandchildren as descendants.  So in the fashion of the day, he started looking them up on social media.  He was basically a true Facebook stalker but after a few late nights and lots of diligence, he found the female grandchild and reached out via facebook messenger.

In November 2017, he sent this off into the world…

“Hi,
My name is Mike K. and I was born in XXX Indiana and was adopted.  I was linked to the {Insert Family Name} by an Ancestry DNA test.  If you have any information, it would be greatly appreciated.”

He didn’t hear anything back for four months.

Then in March of 2018, he received a message back…

“Hi Brother,
I think I can answer a few questions you might have…”

NEW FAMILY

And the rest is history…

*There’s more we’ve found out over the last almost two years… And I’ll continue to share about our New Family as they are a huge part of our life now!

Adoption has left us with a lot of things…
Family, Memories, Love, More Family, New Adventures

 

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Categories:
2019, Blog, Deep Thoughts, National Days
Tags:
adoption, ancestry, ancestry.com, biological parents, family tree, New family

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A little about me…

Hey There! I'm Abby. Some people started calling me "Little Miss Martha" a few years back and this blog followed. I started it to share my DIY wedding progress, but it's now evolved to include other good things. Read More…

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Abby || Lifestyle Blogger
My Fridays are for cleaning up… And I guess I k My Fridays are for cleaning up… 
And I guess I know what I’m doing next! 🤦‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️🤦‍♀️
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Needing a nice sleep after a long week at work and Needing a nice sleep after a long week at work and tired fighting kids… 
See you later! 

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#momofgirlslife #fiveyearsapart #afterdinner #sleepitoff #wellthatwasfun #offtobed #sistersforever #that70sshow
Summer nights and hot air balloons?! What’s bett Summer nights and hot air balloons?! What’s better than that?! 
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#hotairballoons #westfieldin #summernights🌙
Last week was the first day back to school after w Last week was the first day back to school after what felt like a long blink of summer… so I figured I’d surprise the girls with a fun after school snack, because why not. In true me style, I finished this with 5 min to spare before the bus dropped Olive off!  And I have to thank @libbydibbydoo for her encouragement in the success that usually comes from my procrastinations…😜

The future looks bright for my two nuggets and so why not decorate and celebrate with squiggle balloons, paper airplanes, paper chains, and more to get us all back into the school swing!  Plus, topped it off with #minilitebrites lit up with their grades and @crumblcookies!  I’d say it was a win! 

Balloons, Mini Highlighters & Plates - @partycity 
Mini Lite Brites - @target
Cookies - @crumblcookies 
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#backtoschooltips #backtoschoolcookies #backtoschooldecor #afterschoolsnack #futureisbright #bts2022 #schoolsbackinsession #celebrations🎉 #celebratesmallmoments #smallcelebration
Easy after school // back to school surprise you c Easy after school // back to school surprise you can do!  You just need plates, snacks, and a small
Suprise! 
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#afterschoolsnack #backtoschooltips #makemagic #smallcelebration #biggerisntbetter #makememorieseveryday #occasions #firstdaybacktoschool #smallsurprises
And they are off! Hopeful for a great year for AL And they are off! 
Hopeful for a great year for ALL of us! 

https://www.instagram.com/reel/ChHq6DVgDNF/?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=
FREEDOM!!! The kids are back in school which means FREEDOM!!! The kids are back in school which means it’s time for regular schedules and bedtimes, which in turn means I have ME time again!!! PARTY!!!! 

So… inquiring minds want to know… what would you like to see on LMMBlog in the coming months!?!? Because I might have time to tackle some things now!!! 🙌🏻
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#backtoschool2022 #firstdayofkindergarten #firstdayof5thgrade #momfreedom #backtothegrind #momlifeunfiltered
If you are close to Chicago, you may want to check If you are close to Chicago, you may want to check out the @stranger.things.store in Oak Brook!  It’s only open for a couple more weeks, but it’s def worth checking out if you are a fan!  Lots of fun photo ops, exclusive merch, and plenty of details to take in! 

We recently planned a stop and visited on the way to our vacation final destination!  Loved surprising the girls with this one!  The only other stores are currently in Dallas and Paris!!! 

Read more on the blog at hellomissmartha.com! 
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#summerbucketlist #strangerthingsfan #ifionlycould #strangerthingsstore #strangerthingssummer #visitillinois #visitchicago #summerfun☀️ #familyroadtrip #robincosplay
At the start of every school year, I looked forwar At the start of every school year, I looked forward to the one year the girls would be together in school and get to ride the bus together. Well, this is that year, but  instead they but they are split up with Ella heading into 5th at the Intermediate school that’s probably bigger than my high school and a class of what I heard was 700+ 🤯 and Olive heading into Kindergarten at Shamrock ☘️ which also might be bigger than Dwenger 🤣. Can’t wait to see the what this year brings! 

Cheers to a great 2022-2023 school year!
If you’ve been here a while, you know I love a g If you’ve been here a while, you know I love a good tablescape!  This one comes to you from @indyspotpicnics!  She set this up for a fun litttle #CreatorsNightOut with @theindymommy!  Glad to partake in the fun and meet up with some other creative ladies! 

Until next time…🙌🏻
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#indycreatorsociety #indyentrepreneurs #indybloggers #summerpicnic #summernights🌙 #creativegatherings
Ready for a beautiful creators evening with @thein Ready for a beautiful creators evening with @theindymommy and this lovely picnic-scape from @indyspotpicnics! 

Lovely picnic really set up by @indyspotpicnics but felt like playing magical momma! ;) 
Thanks for the invite! 
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#theindymommy #indycreatorsociety #creatornight #indyblogger #welcomefriends #indyspotpicnics
Truth bomb today! I’d love to be a feed that’ Truth bomb today!  I’d love to be a feed that’s beautifully consistent with gorgeous styled photos, but let’s be real, these kids are with me nonstop and usually they have something on their faces and we go places like Costco and Waterparks to make memories… so… 
Welcome to my real world!  Hope you hang around! 
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#clownjuice #marriedacarney #sometimessharingbeautiful #realmomlife #conflictedcreative #wetry #welcometomyworld #momlife #justamom
Just a couple hours south of Indy, you’ll find @ Just a couple hours south of Indy, you’ll find @graduatehotels where some #strangerthings are happening… 

We surprised our Super Fab daughter with a stay in their Stranger Things Suite a few weeks ago and boy was she surprised… 
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#strangerthingsfan #strangerthingsdecor #strangerthingssuite #thegradutaehotels #upsidedownatgraduate #theupsidedown #summerbucketlist
Back in July we decided to head on a Strange adven Back in July we decided to head on a Strange adventure. It was a Surprise for Ella, our Stranger Things Super Fan!  After becoming a fan myself, thanks to her, I started looking into Stranger Things experiences!  I mean, it’s based in Indiana so why shouldn’t there be something here?!?

Well… @graduatehotels came back having a Stranger Things suite and after talking it over with Mike, we decided it was the perfect summer weekend away with a twist! 

Scroll to see a few pics, head over to the blog #linkinmybio for a recap of the whole experience and keep an eye out for a reels a bit later! 
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#strangerthingsfan #strangerthingsexperience #strangerthingssuite #upsidedownatgraduate #thegraduate #upsidedown #indianafun #visitbloomington #summerbucketlist
Just some minor updates in the guest room for unde Just some minor updates in the guest room for under $50!  New DIY curtain and rods inspired by West Elm soon to be on the blog!  Check the link in bio now for guest room must haves! 
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#copycatchic #lookforless #diyhome #guestroomdecor #guestroom #welcomeguests #diyhomeprojects
Preparing the guest room for visitors! It was abo Preparing the guest room for visitors!  It was about a month since anyone had been here and now we are a revolving door again!  What’s one thing you love to see in guest rooms when you visit? 

When guests come to town, you want them to be comfortable. While this space is really a mishmash of things old, older, and some new, it doesn’t have to feel like a hand-me-down room! 

Check out my must haves for your guest room over on the blog… #linkinmybio 

Follow my shop @Little Miss Martha Blog on the @shop.LTK app to shop this post and get my exclusive app-only content!

#liketkit #LTKhome #LTKfamily #LTKstyletip
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https://liketk.it/3JuQ2
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#guestroom #guestroomdecor #guestroommusthaves #visitors #welcomefriends #cozyspaces
I feel like I’m always running up that hill… I I feel like I’m always running up that hill…
It’s been a summer full of Stranger Things over here and even Olive is loving the soundtrack of the summer! 
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#runningupthathill #strangerthingssoundtrack #strangerthingsfan #strangerthingseveryday #katebush #katebushmusic
Happy Birthday to this guy! It’s a mini milesto Happy Birthday to this guy!  It’s a mini milestone and you wear it well!  Wishing you a day filled with Jeep rides to small town USA, puppies, freezer fixing, and maybe a door dashed cake later! 🎉🤣🎉😉
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#happybirthdayhusband #happiestbirthday #manofthehouse #fortyfive #likeafinewine #justababyface
The 2022 Indiana State Fair is just a few days awa The 2022 Indiana State Fair is just a few days away! 

We have the BEST memories going to the fair and make more every year!  Plus, there’s something for everyone. 

What’s your fave fair memory?! 

The popular $2 Tuesdays are gone since the fair is closed Mondays and Tuesdays. Instead, fairgoers can take advantage of $3 Thursdays, with $3 admission, $3 midway rides and $3 food options at each food stand.
@indystatefair 
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#indianastatefair #ourstatefairisagreatstatefair #indianafairgrounds #statefair #summermemories #indiana
I saw somewhere it’s National Carousel Day! We I saw somewhere it’s National Carousel Day!  We love us some gorgeous old school carousels… how about you?! We have to ride them wherever we see them!  I blame my former life carnie husband 🤣

Do you have a local fave? 

Pics by swipe! 
1. Navy Pier, Chicago @navypierchicago
2. Forest Park, Noblesville @noblesvillein @noblesvilleparks 
3. FW Zoo, Fort Wayne @fwkidszoo 
4. Charming Carousel, @waltdisneyworld 
5. Kringle’s Carousel, Merry Prairie, @connerprairie 
6. Indianapolis Zoo Carousel, @indianapoliszoo 
7.  Carousel Wishes & Dreams (old Broadripple carousel), Indianapolis @childrensmuseum 
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